Your Weekly American Top Ten List

10.  At today’s​ prices​, Air Force One has​ just​ ​enough fuel for PR trips to Europe…    but not to our own border. 

 9.  To add sprinkles to ​Joseph’s​ ice cream cone, server charges an extra $11​.​

 8.  Just since last year, the taxpayer cost for the Vice President’s “NO BAIL” tattoo has gone from $2,000 to $5,000.

 7.  President Zelensky emerges from secret location to request foreign aid in pesos, not dollars.

 6.   Cost of 33 RPM ​Victrola​ record players and rotary-dial phones are through the roof!

 5.    From the Oval Office window, you can see hot dog vendors pushing wheelbarrows of cash to the bank.

 4.     New Federal poverty level ​for 2023:   $96,753 per annum​.

 3.   Joseph’s “hair plugs tune-up” will cost taxpayers $7,000 this year, versus $4,000 last year​… (​even in Delaware​!)​

​ 2. ​ Remember that $8 billion worth of military hardware Mr. Biden left in Afghanistan?     The Taliban is willing to sell it back to us for a mere trillion.

…and the NUMBER ONE WAY JOSEPH BIDEN and KAMALA are BEGINNING to SENSE THAT INFLATION is a PROBLEM is….

​ 1.   According to Hunter, an “escort” charges $200 more today than on St. Paddy’s Day.

​

“Your Weekly American Top Ten list” is intended as humorous commentary, and is NOT a source of real news.

To subscribe to the “Top Ten” for free, please visit  www.gipperten.com .  Then, complete the “subscribe” boxes and submit.

While on the site, you can catch up on previous Top Tens from 2016-2022 by scrolling back.   Enjoy!

To communicate with the editor, please e-mail  [email protected]  .

10.  At today’s​ prices​, Air Force One has​ just​ ​enough fuel for PR trips to Europe…    but not to our own border. 

 9.  To add sprinkles to ​Joseph’s​ ice cream cone, server charges an extra $11​.​

 8.  Just since last year, the taxpayer cost for the Vice President’s “NO BAIL” tattoo has gone from $2,000 to $5,000.

 7.  President Zelensky emerges from secret location to request foreign aid in pesos, not dollars.

 6.   Cost of 33 RPM ​Victrola​ record players and rotary-dial phones are through the roof!

 5.    From the Oval Office window, you can see hot dog vendors pushing wheelbarrows of cash to the bank.

 4.     New Federal poverty level ​for 2023:   $96,753 per annum​.

 3.   Joseph’s “hair plugs tune-up” will cost taxpayers $7,000 this year, versus $4,000 last year​… (​even in Delaware​!)​

​ 2. ​ Remember that $8 billion worth of military hardware Mr. Biden left in Afghanistan?     The Taliban is willing to sell it back to us for a mere trillion.

…and the NUMBER ONE WAY JOSEPH BIDEN and KAMALA are BEGINNING to SENSE THAT INFLATION is a PROBLEM is…

​ 1.   According to Hunter, an “escort” charges $200 more today than on St. Paddy’s Day.​

“Your Weekly American Top Ten list” is intended as humorous commentary, and is NOT a source of real news.

To subscribe to the “Top Ten” for free, please visit  www.gipperten.com .  Then, complete the “subscribe” boxes and submit.

While on the site, you can catch up on previous Top Tens from 2016-2022 by scrolling back.   Enjoy!

To communicate with the editor, please e-mail  [email protected]  .

10.  At today’s​ prices​, Air Force One has​ just​ ​enough fuel for PR trips to Europe…    but not to our own border. 

 9.  To add sprinkles to ​Joseph’s​ ice cream cone, server charges an extra $11​.​

 8.  Just since last year, the taxpayer price for the Vice President’s “NO BAIL” tattoo has gone from $2,000 to $5,000.

 7.  President Zelensky emerges from secret location to request foreign aid in pesos, not dollars.

 6.   Cost of 33 RPM ​Victrola​ record players and rotary-dial phones are through the roof!

 5.    From the Oval Office window, you can see hot dog vendors pushing wheelbarrows of cash to the bank.

 4.     New Federal poverty level ​for 2023:   $96,753 per annum​.

 3.   Joseph’s “hair plugs tune-up” will cost taxpayers $7,000 this year, versus $4,000 last year​… (​even in Delaware​!).​

​ 2. ​ Remember that $8 billion worth of military hardware Mr. Biden left in Afghanistan?     The Taliban is willing to sell it back to us for a mere trillion.

…and the NUMBER ONE WAY JOSEPH BIDEN and KAMALA are BEGINNING to SENSE THAT INFLATION is a PROBLEM is:

​ 1.   According to Hunter, an “escort” charges $200 more today than on St. Paddy’s Day.

​

“Your Weekly American Top Ten list” is intended as humorous commentary, and is NOT a source of real news.

To subscribe to the “Top Ten” for free, please visit  www.gipperten.com .  Then, complete the “subscribe” boxes and submit.

While on the site, you can catch up on previous Top Tens from 2016-2022 by scrolling back.   Enjoy!

To communicate with the editor, please e-mail  [email protected]  .

​10.   “Hear me out, inflation can be a good thing.​“

 9.    “The world is a dangerous place.   That’s why Democrats say: Let’s cut the defense budget.“

 8.   “Democrats delivered on every promise.  Now, we feel your pain.“

 7.   “End the ‘Car Culture.’  Let’s Wait for the Electric Bus Together.“

 6.   “Proudly Shutting Down Natural Gas… and Opening Up that Southern Border.“

 5.  “We have only Six Years to Handle the ‘Climate Crisis,’ friends.”   (John Kerry Speak​ing​ from the cabin of his Private Jet.)

 4.   “Death and Taxes — Why Settle for Just One?“

 3.   “Peace through bumbling.“

 2.  “Cuomo Who?”

—and the NUMBER ONE HOUSE DEMOCRAT “TRIAL BALLOON” SLOGAN for NOVEMBER is…

1.   “Endorsed by Kamala Harris.“

“Your Weekly American Top Ten list” is intended as humorous commentary, and is NOT a source of real news.

To subscribe to the “Top Ten” for free, please visit  www.gipperten.com .  Then, complete the “subscribe” boxes and submit.

While on the site, you can catch up on previous Top Tens from 2016-2022 by scrolling back.   Enjoy!

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10.    “I have to go all the way to Warsaw for a Big Mac?  Really?”

 9.   “ Wow, this babe on “Moscow-mingle.com” is looking for a real man who’s not ashamed of his nuclear arsenal.”

 8.    “Who says that I’m polling worse than Congress?”

7. “Time for a new shirtless ride on horseback.”

 6.   “ When Stephanopoulos is on vacay, maybe I can guest host GMA…”

 5.   “ Ya’think the troops would accept payment in Bitcoin and vodka?”

 4.   “Get a hold of yourself, Vlady-boy.   Stalin never cried….”

 3.   “ Looks like we won’t be hosting the Olympics any time soon.”

 2.   “ I guess ol’ Kim Jong-un just doesn’t have any food to spare.”

…and the NUMBER ONE INNERMOST THOUGHT of VLADIMIR PUTIN is…

 1.  “ Y’know, I could rein in that Amber Heard right quick.”

“Your Weekly American Top Ten list” is intended as humorous commentary, and is NOT a source of real news.

To subscribe to the “Top Ten” for free, please visit  www.gipperten.com .  Then, complete the “subscribe” boxes and submit.

While on the site, you can catch up on previous Top Tens from 2016-2022 by scrolling back.   Enjoy!

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10.  Waved at ​thousands of migrants iIllegally​ crossing our southern border (​from D.C., ​by Zoom only, of course).

 9.  Gathered European Heads-of-State by Skype​,​ Once Again​,​ to repeat her prescient “We could be on the brink of war in Europe” prediction.

 8.  ​Counsel​ed​ Hunter​ on how he could score best prices for his world-class artwork.​

 7.  Gave cackling Insider’s Tour of her Naval Observatory residence to MSNBC.

 6.  Repeated such deep thoughts as:  “the Governor and I were talking about the significance of the passage of time…..”

 5.   Held news conference to blame Vladimir Putin for inflation.

 4.   Issued “VP White Paper” on how U.S. energy independence was actually a bad thing.

 3.  Condemned those who oppose trillions in new Federal welfare spending… (while personally donating only 1.6% of her $1.7 million income to charity.)

​  2.   Signed new appeal letter seeking funds to bail out more violent offenders. 

…and the NUMBER ONE “LESSON in LEADERSHIP” is:

1.   Using frantic hand signals, directed the President on his best route to exit a stage.

“Your Weekly American Top Ten list” is intended as humorous commentary, and is NOT a source of real news.

To subscribe to the “Top Ten” for free, please visit  www.gipperten.com .  Then, complete the “subscribe” boxes and submit.

While on the site, you can catch up on previous Top Tens from 2016-2022 by scrolling back.   Enjoy!

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10.  “You don’t work for Barack anymore.   You don’t work for Barack anymore.”

 9.  “It’s Putin’s fault, man.”

 8.   “Remember, Kamala is my Vice President, Katanji is the new Supreme Court lady.”

 7.  “Men’s room is two rights and a quick left.”

 6.   “​ Tell ’em: ​No, do I look like ‘The Big Guy?​‘​“

 5.   “Hunter? I used to enjoy skiing in the Catskills.”

 4.  “Wait, is this the Naval Observatory?”

 3. ​  “So, Vladimir is the Russian and Volodymyr is the Ukrainian? So who is Olaf?”

 2.    “No questions today…    Jen, take over.”  (That was easy! No press pushback!)​

…and the NUMBER ONE “NOTE to SELF” FOUND ATOP the OVAL OFFICE DESK in the WHITE HOUSE THIS WEEK” is:

 1.  ​ “If your family can’t cash in on your foreign friends, what’s the dang point?”

“Your Weekly American Top Ten list” is intended as humorous commentary, and is NOT a source of real news.

To subscribe to the “Top Ten” for free, please visit  www.gipperten.com .  Then, complete the “subscribe” boxes and submit.

While on the site, you can catch up on previous Top Tens from 2016-2022 by scrolling back.   Enjoy!

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10.  Putin is bad.  He should leave.  ​ First name:    ​Vladimir​, it says here.​

 9.  No, I’m not walkin’ that back.

 8.  My $​5.8​ trillion budget is paid for​, Jack​  (White House press corps will never ask how…)

 7.  I had pizza with our troops in Kyev… I mean…

 6.  I am passionately, morally, truly outraged (–fill in the blank)..

 5.   Our Vice President really unified NATO, didn’t she?

 4.    What laptop?

 3.   The border is secure.  Jen​, show them​ the live video from Dallas.

 2.   Fentanil?   Is that the new Cleveland team name?

…and the NUMBER ONE JOSEPH BIDEN “TAKE” from 3×5 CARDS PROVIDED by WHITE HOUSE STAFF is:

 1.   What inflation?

“Your Weekly American Top Ten list” is intended as humorous commentary, and is NOT a source of real news.

To subscribe to the “Top Ten” for free, please visit  www.gipperten.com .  Then, complete the “subscribe” boxes and submit.

While on the site, you can catch up on previous Top Tens from 2016-2022 by scrolling back.   Enjoy!

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10.  When you cross from Delaware into Maryland, you can buy different flavors of crack.

 9.  Even when spaced out and semi-conscious, Hunter refers to his stepmother as “Doctor.”

 8.  When flying private, like on a Gulfstream, the owners of the aircraft will get really mad when you bust up furniture and china on-board.

 7.   In a “gentlemen’s” club, the women are friendlier than out in the general population.

 6.  The New York Post is really, really accurate.

 5.  Though pixilated, one of Hunter’s videos appears to include a burro and a clown.

 4.  Venmo is practical when sharing cash bonanzas from China and Ukraine with family members  (Including the “Big Guy”).

 3.   The laptop contains 37 marriage proposals, all sent by e-mail.

 2.  Hunter pressed Dad for open borders, arguing for his “supply chain” needs.

…and the NUMBER ONE DISCOVERY as HUNTER’S LAPTOP gets a THOROUGH READING is…

 1.   In a “trial run” survey for Governor of Delaware, Hunter leads all Democrats.

“Your Weekly American Top Ten list” is intended as humorous commentary, and is NOT a source of real news.

To subscribe to the “Top Ten” for free, please visit  www.gipperten.com .  Then, complete the “subscribe” boxes and submit.

While on the site, you can catch up on previous Top Tens from 2016-2022 by scrolling back.   Enjoy!

To communicate with the editor, please e-mail  [email protected]  .

10. “In Wilmington, my ice cream cone went from $3.50 to $4.75.    Son-uffa B—-!   That ice cream server blamed ME for inflation!”

 9. “Vladimir is just tryin’ to jack my gas prices, which helps Trump.”

 8.  “Those dang construction workers on the Keystone Pipeline! They coulda kept goin’ as volunteers.”

 7.  “Back in Scranton, my Grampa told me how he bought a Model-T for under $3.   That’s only $3, man!”

 6.  “Why can’t Elon Musk just deliver 20 million electric vehicles ?”

 5.  “Flooding our economy with deficit-fueled, printing-press dollars makes most everything more expensive.”

            (Wait!  How did this nonsense get in here??)

 4.  “Dr. Jill, what is worse, a hyper-inflation, or… a hyper-sonic?”

 3. “In 1982, the U.S. taxpayers paid only $5,000 for my hair plug transplants.  Now, my next of plugs is gonna cost $30,000!   That’s inflation, folks.”

 2.   “Maybe we ought to cut out the Russian caviar in the White House Mess.”

…and the NUMBER ONE JOSEPH BIDEN MUSING on RUNAWAY INFLATION is…

 1.”Hunter just has to step up and bring home more bacon.  That’s all, no malarkey.”