Your Weekly American Top Ten List

10.  ​Is the blonde ​your translator or mine?​

 9.  So, if, ​ ​just IF you were to build a hotel in Moscow,  just if, who would supply you with Stol​i​chnaya?

 8. Yeah, imagine being married to Angela.  

 7.  You stop nagging me about Ukraine, and I’ll ​cut way back on my​ MSNBC​ ads​ next year.

 6. There’s no video, right?  Is there?   Stop grinning.

 5.   I once had a wisemouth like Nancy Pelosi, too.

​4. Really, how did you get down to a 13% flat income tax?

 3.  Yes, Ivana is still single.  Why do you ask?

 2.  If I bought at Mar-a-Lago, would you throw in a golf cart?

…and the NUMBER ONE ACTUAL PHRASE OVERHEARD in RECENT TRUMP – PUTIN CONVERSATIONS is…

 1.  Believe me, you remove shirt, jump on horse, and approval rating will be 60%.  

“Your Weekly American Top Ten list” is intended as humorous commentary, and is NOT a source of real news.

To subscribe to the “Top Ten” for free, please visit  www.gipperten.com .  Then, complete the “subscribe” boxes and submit.

While on the site, you can catch up on previous Top Tens from 2016-2019 by scrolling back.   Enjoy!

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10. “The North American Olympic Pole Vault Training Center”

 9. “Frozen Dunes”

 8. “The Gladiator Challenge Experience”

 7. “The Pelosi Palisades”

 6. “Big Bend National Park – WEST”

 5. “Schumer – Trump Towers”

 4. “Caravan Welcome Center”

 3.   ‘”Chavez-Maduro Rest Stop” (stocked with good ol’ US toilet paper)

 2.    “Won’t You be my Neighbor Fencing”

…and the NUMBER ONE “ALTERNATIVE” NAME for “the WALL” that MIGHT GAIN DEMOCRAT SUPPORT is….

 1.   “The Ocasio – Cortez Handball Courts”  (applicable to concrete border barriers only)

“Your Weekly American Top Ten list” is intended as humorous commentary, and is NOT a source of real news.

To subscribe to the “Top Ten” for free, please visit  www.gipperten.com .  Then, complete the “subscribe” boxes and submit.

While on the site, you can catch up on previous Top Tens from 2016-2019 by scrolling back.   Enjoy!

To communicate with the editor, please e-mail  [email protected]  .

10.  LAS VEGAS ODDS-MAKERS TAKING BETS ON “DELIVERY DATE” OF MUELLER ​REPORT​  

9.  CNN’S ACOSTA OBLIVIOUS TO FACT THAT HIS NEWS REPORT MAKES A STRONG CASE FOR A BORDER WALL​

​ 8.  DATA REBUTS CUOMO CLAIM THAT NEW YORKERS FLEE THE STATE “DUE TO THE WEATHER”​ 

​ 7.  RATINGS CRASH FOR GOLDEN GLOBES TELECAST LINKED TO FAR-LEFT DIATRIBES IN SOME ACCEPTANCE SPEECHES 

 6. SCHUMER, PELOSI SEEN AS INCREASINGLY UNHINGED, EVEN ​PROCLAIMING​ WALLS TO BE “IMMORAL”

 5. INCLUDING REBOUND WEEK, STOCK PRICES CLIMB TO 27% GAIN SINCE TRUMP INAUGURAL

 4.  SECRETARY POMPEO CELEBRATED FOR COGENT ASSERTION OF U.S.​ DOCTRINE IN CAIRO SPEECH

 3. FATHER OF PARKLAND HIGH SCHOOL SHOOTING VICTIM APPLAUDS PRESIDENT’S OUTLINE FOR SCHOOL SAFETY, DECRIES OBAMA POLICIES of “LENIENCY”

 2. FOLLOWING U.S. LEAD, BRAZIL AND OTHER NATIONS PLAN EMBASS​Y MOVES​ FROM TEL AVIV TO JERUSALEM

…and the NUMBER ONE HEADLINE WE WON’T BE READING in the WASHINGTON POST THIS WEEK is…

 1.DISAPPOINTED BY REACTION TO HIS DENTAL APPOINTMENT VIDEO, “BETO” O’ROURKE ​PONDERS​ LIVE ​STREAMING​ OF ​HIS UPCOMING​ PROSTATE EXAM

“Your Weekly American Top Ten list” is intended as humorous commentary, and is not a source of real news.

To subscribe for free to the Top Ten list, please visit  www.gipperten.com  .    Then, complete the “subscribe” boxes and submit.    While on the site, you can catch up on previous Top Tens by scrolling back through posts from 2016-2019,   Enjoy!

To communicate with the editor, please e-mail  [email protected]  .

10. Senator Schumer is holding up the President’s Ambassadorial nominations….   (Wait — Wasn’t that happening anyway?)

 9. Paramours at Department of Justice have even more time for extra curricular activities.

8.   White House Mess now offering only KFC and Taco Bell at lunch.  (Now the President may never compromise).

 7. Despondent Federal employees available for interviews at nearly all ski resorts near major media markets.

 6. Government workers around the US will need a few extra years to replace Federal building lobby portraits of President Obama with those of President Trump.

 5. “Vital” winter Federal trainings in Las Vegas, the US Virgin Islands, Atlantic City and San Diego postponed for weeks (WEEKS, I tell you!)….    (These are all actual locations of past Federal trainings!)

 4.   A few guys down at the bar are wondering if maybe big government isn’t as necessary as they’ve been telling us.

 3. Federal GSA workers lament that whitewashing of the Washington Monument must be postponed until spring.

 2. U.S. Embassy in Cuba just might have to be closed.

…and the NUMBER ONE LITTLE KNOWN CONSEQUENCE of the FEDERAL GOVERNMENT “SHUTDOWN” is:

1.Nancy Pelosi flew back to DC on a commercial flight.

“Your Weekly American Top Ten list” is intended as humorous commentary, and is NOT a source of real news. To subscribe to the “Top Ten” for free, please log on to www.gipperten.com . Then, complete the “subscribe” boxes and submit.

While on the site, you can catch up on previous Top Tens from 2016 – 18 by scrolling back. Enjoy!

To communicate with the editor, please e-mail to: [email protected]