10. WAS THE THIRD PERSON AND FIRST OPENLY GAY MAN TO WALK ON THE MOON
9. ORGANIZED VOLLEYBALL GAME ON THE MOON WITH “OTHER VISITORS,” LEADING THE “EARTHLINGS” TEAM TO 21-18 VICTORY
8. DUMPED A KARDASHIAN IN ORDER TO DATE MARJORIE TAYLOR GREEN
7. BODY DOUBLE FOR DOLPH LUNDGREN IN SIX MOTION PICTURES
6. SKIPPED CONGRESSIONAL MEDAL OF HONOR CEREMONY IN ORDER TO BE FIRST PERSON TO WALK THROUGH THE BERLIN WALL, NOV. 1989
5. THOUGH IDENTIFYING AS A MAN AT THE TIME, WAS AN 11-TIME JEOPARDY WINNER IN 2021
4. WON GRAMMY NOMINATION FOR COMPOSING AND PERFORMING “WHO LET THE DOGS OUT?”
3. PRINCIPLE ANCHORPERSON FOR “CNN TONIGHT” (no known witnesses to disprove this)
2. SELECTED LAST WEEK TO BECOME THE 8TH ACTOR TO PORTRAY “JAMES BOND” IN THE MOVIES
… and the NUMBER ONE “RESUME EMBELLISHMENT” from MEMBERS of CONGRESS is…
1. TEMPORARILY DISPLACED ADAM SCHIFF AS THE “MOST FLAMBOYANT LIAR” IN THE U.S. CONGRESS
“Your Weekly American Top Ten list” is intended as humorous commentary, and is NOT a source of real news.
To subscribe to the “Top Ten” for free, please visit www.gipperten.com . Then, complete the “subscribe” boxes and submit.
While on the site, you can catch up on previous Top Tens from 2016-2023 by scrolling back. Enjoy!
To communicate with the editor, please e-mail herbstupp@gmail.com .