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TOP TEN SECRET PROMISES MADE to OBTAIN VOTES for SPEAKER of the HOUSE…

 

  1. The “smoking lounge” for members will be re-opened …. but only to pot users.    – Hakeem

 

  1. One House session per month will be convened in Eagle Pass, Texas.     – Byron

 

  1. They nominated me for WHAT?         – Donald

 

  1. OK, we will have to vote in person.   But that could be from the Capitol Yoga Class.     – Hakeem

 

  1. Of course the Cheyenne Mountain NORAD Base should be renamed for Lauren Boebert.    -Kevin

 

  1.  The 21st tourist to visit the House Cannon Building each Monday will be able to trigger a “motion to remove the Speaker.”     -Matt

 

  1.   As part of the “House Wellness” program, Statuary Hall will be home to the new “Andy Biggs Hot Tub & Spa.”      -Kevin

 

  1.  By special arrangement, but after midnight, Air Force Two will be requisitioned for a lucky member’s flight back to “their” district.                                                           – Hakeem

 

  1.   That great Christy painting of the “Framers at Independence Hall?”   We can photo-shop your likeness between Hamilton & Madison…. IF you are the deciding vote.    –Kevin

 

…and the NUMBER ONE SECRET PROMISE to OBTAIN VOTES for SPEAKER of the HOUSE is…

 

  1.  Who wants to be the new spokesman for “My Pillow?”     -Chip

 

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