10. “GENIUS” SWEATSHIRT, showcasing portrait of Joseph Biden with Einstein hair.
9. DUPLICATE OF COMANDANTE MADURO’S FORMAL-WEAR MILITARY JACKET, always an ice-breaker on the first date.
8. FULL-BODY JUMP SUITS, embroidered with DAY-GLO “CLIMATE EMERGENCY” message on back. Required by dress code on Harry and Megan’s private jets (John Kerry purchased the first one).
7. “THE BORDER IS NOW CLOSED” LEG-WARMERS, to distract fellow gym-rats from noticing your gut.
6. GAS MASK & HELMET COMBO, for those peaceful protests that might, maybe, possibly lead to arson & looting. Hammer & sickle decal optional. Available only in Midnight Black, to complement your formalwear.
5. 100% DIAMOND and EMERALD NECKLACE, spelling out “TAX WEALTH NOW.” The perfect accessory for NYC’s annual “Met Gala.”
4. “I VOTED FOR SOCIALISM, and ALL I GOT is THIS LOUSY BASEBALL CAP.”
3. “EVEN THIS SMOKING JACKET COUNTS AS ‘INFRASTRUCTURE.'”
2. “NOT A TOXIC ‘CIS’ MALE” 3-cornered tin-foil hat.
…and the NUMBER ONE “MUST HAVE” FASHION ITEM, to COMPLEMENT AOC’S “TAX the RICH” DRESS is:
1. “TALKING” AUDIO HANDBAG with KAMALA “CACKLING” WHENEVER “SOUTHERN BORDER” is brought up.
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