10. “Shirtless guys in Viking helmets will be seated over there, sir.”
9. “….Yeah, OK, I do sort-of swear to consider defending, like, the Constitution…”
8. “Dr. Biden, I mean Jill honey: what is more, a trillion or a gazillion?”
7. “Here’s the claim check for your body armor, ma’am…”
6. “No, we weren’t kidding about free health care for illegals.”
5. “The people have spoken. Now they will get what they voted for, good and hard.” **
4. “Ask not what your country can do for you… simply track the status of your direct deposits.”
3. “Where’s Melania?” –former President William J. Clinton
2. “Wow, here’s another 45,000 votes from Georgia.”
…and the NUMBER ONE PHRASE CERTAIN to be UTTERED at the INAUGURATION CEREMONIES is…
1. “No Kamala, this is Joseph’s time to speak.”
** With thanks to H. L. Mencken…
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