10. “All I Want for Christmas is Real News” — White House Press Secretary Kayleigh McEneny
9. “Mistletoe Me” — Bill Clinton
8. “Feliz Michigan” — Gov. Gretchen Whitmer toasts the 10,000 deceased Detroiters who voted last month
7. “Run Run Rudolph” — Chuck Berry III in wonderment at the former mayor’s apparent simultaneous presence in Atlanta, Philadelphia, Las Vegas, Milwaukee and Atlanta.
6. “Rockin’ Around the Dominion Machine” – Stacey Abrams choreographs a Nutcracker ballet with a “voter suppression” theme
5. “Grandpa Got Run Over by the Fake News” — Jim Acosta, Rachel Maddow and Chuck Todd don red suits
4. “All I Want for Christmas is Joe” – Xi Jinping and the Central Committee
3. “Ballots Roasting O’er an Open Fire” -Wisconsin Governor Evers keeps warm with votes exceeding actual local populations
2. “O Come all Ye Faithful” – through voice track mixing, Congresswoman Ocasio and Commandante Maduro beckon lovers of expanding deep state powers..
…and the NUMBER ONE HOLIDAY SONG WE’D LIKE to HEAR is:
- “I’m Dreaming of a White Supremacist” — The White House Press Corps Chorale
“Your Weekly American Top Ten list” is intended as humorous commentary, and is NOT a source of real news.
To subscribe to the “Top Ten” for free, please visit www.gipperten.com . Then, complete the “subscribe” boxes and submit.
While on the site, you can catch up on previous Top Tens from 2016-2020 by scrolling back. Enjoy!
To communicate with the editor, please e-mail firstname.lastname@example.org .