- No, that can’t be a tiny I.V. running up Joseph’s sleeve…. can it?
- A tiny earphone for the president. (How else could he hear us?)
- To avoid disinformation, the Biden team will control all microphones.
- Questions and topics to be developed by Hakeem Jeffries, Rachel Maddow, Kamala, Stephen Colbert and Kim Jong-un.
- Soft candle lighting only, please.
- Simultaneous live translations of the President’s responses in Spanish, Chinese, Korean, Russian, Tagalog, Hindi, Japanese, Afrikaans, Swahili, Haitian Creole, Yiddish, but most importantly… in clear, intelligible ENGLISH.
- Three 20-minute coffee or chilled Red Bull breaks.
- The President will require two nurses… err…. Secret Service associates… at his lectern.
- Only President Biden will receive debate questions in advance. (Hey, CNN did that for Hillary, right?)
… and the NUMBER ONE DEMAND the BIDEN TEAM is MAKING PRIOR to the UPCOMING PRESIDENTIAL DEBATES is…
- To avoid “cackling eruptions,” Kamala will remain in a secure. sound-proof isolation booth until sign-off.
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