- That wafting smell on West 41st Street is not from a Longhorn stable.
9. You mean we have to pay income taxes here?
- The grinning guy with the hat on the “A” train is not a Texas Ranger.
- In Texas, “squatters” can be “persuaded” to find alternative lodging, pretty much immediately.
- The “Best Little Whorehouse” is not in Luckenbach, plus we call ‘em “sex workers” here.
- Texas has “The Alamo,” we’ve got “Fort Apache.”
- Along the BQE, that is wind-swept trash, not tumbleweeds.
- In Greenwich Village, a man wearing chaps is not guaranteed to be a “cattle-drivin’, six-gun totin'” cowboy.
- Really? Jacob deGrom left the Mets to pitch in a no-income tax state?
…and the NUMBER ONE WAY to TELL YOU’RE in NEW YORK and NOT in TEXAS is…
- I know a guy here who has to post a quick $500 million bond for a “crime” with no victims.
“Your Weekly American Top Ten list” is intended as humorous commentary, and is NOT a source of real news.
To subscribe to the “Top Ten” for free, please visit www.gipperten.com . Then, complete the “subscribe” boxes and submit.
While on the site, you can catch up on previous Top Tens from 2016-2024 by scrolling back. Enjoy!
To communicate with the editor, please e-mail herbstupp@gmail.com .