- “Dear Occupant: Season’s Greetings! Here are 20 more unsolicited, blank paper ballots for Election Day 2024, just for you. If you would like an additional supply, just call.” -Democrat State Committee
- “T’is always the season to reach out and touch someone.” –former NY Governor Andrew “Frisky” Cuomo, considering a run for NYC Mayor
- “Feliz Navidad from 35,000 feet above the Rio Grande River.” – Your Border Czarina, Kamala Harris
- “May you get all treats and no tricks this month.” – Joseph Biden, writing from his Delaware basement
- ” I wish you an early Meli Kalikimaka, before climate change floods my state.” -US Sen. Maisie Hirono (D- Hawaii)
- “Dear students and university staff: We can’t define “woman.” “Genocide” requires “context” to comprehend. Hate-driven harassment is protected speech here. But… let us celebrate an equitable, secular winter solstice in one of the many ‘Safe Spaces’ on our beloved campus.” – Selected Ivy League & other top university presidents
- “If you can just believe in Frosty the Snowman… you can believe our southern border is secure.” – Homeland Security Secretary Alejandro Majorkas
3. “Officially Atheistic Holiday Greetings to my loyal subjects. With no gasoline available, we are proudly delivering on our Paris “‘climate’ emissions targets.” – Venezuelan Comandante Nicolas Maduro
- “Thanks for nuthin.” former Congressman George Santos, in his holiday CandyGram messages to all members of the House
…and the NUMBER ONE CHRISTMAS/ HANUKKAH/ HOLIDAY CARD INSCRIPTION for 2024 is:
- “Dear Mr. President: Thank you in advance for the expected resumption of holiday ‘gratuities’ to our peace-loving nation. Nevertheless, death to America.” -Iranian President Hassan Rouhani
“Your Weekly American Top Ten list” is intended as humorous commentary, and is NOT a source of real news.
To subscribe to the “Top Ten” for free, please visit www.gipperten.com . Then, complete the “subscribe” boxes and submit.
While on the site, you can catch up on previous Top Tens from 2016-2023 by scrolling back. Enjoy!
To communicate with the editor, please e-mail herbstupp@gmail.com .
