Your Weekly American Top Ten List

For the uninitiated who want to sing this version around their Christmas trees (also approved for Hanukkah celebrations), here is how the traditional “12 Days” is sung:  You sing each of the song’s 12 lines, in ascending numerical order.   But then you only repeat the “gifts” already received.  

For example:  Start the song with “On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: a partridge in a pear tree.”  But here is how your verse would sound in mid-song:  “On the sixth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: six geese-a-laying, five go-o-o-ld rings, four calling birds, three French hens, two turtle doves, and a partridge in a pear tree.”

 Try that format with today’s creation, below.  Note that singers are expected to dra-a-ag out the syllables on the gift of the “5th Day of Christmas,”in this case “Fi-i-ve impeach – ment probes.”    

 

Now:   Your NEW 12 Days of Christmas….

 

1. On the first day of Christmas, my true love game to me:

           –   “Cash for the Big Guy from Xi.”   (JEE)

 

2. On the second day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:

             –   “Two Cuomos groping.”

 

3. On the third day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:

       – “Three open borders.”

 

      4.  On the fourth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:

       –  “Four Rashidas wailing.”

 

5. On the fifth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:

   –  “F-i-i-ve impeachment probes.”

 

6. On the sixth day of Christmas, my true love to me:

    – “Six healthy justices.”

 

7. On the seventh day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:

       – “Seven spies for Swalwell.”

 

8. On the eighth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:

         – “Eight million migrants.”

 

9. On the ninth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:

          –  “Nine fake newspapers.”

 

10. On the tenth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:

          –  “Ten FBI raids.”

 

11. On the eleventh day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:

           –  “Eleven trillion new debt.”

 

12. On the twelfth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:

          – “Twelve wars out- breaking.”

 

 

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