10. You proudly show your Ilhan Omar tattoo to most everyone.
9. You are for choice…. but never parental school choice, of course.
8. You identified with a new gender this week….
7. “Paying one’s fair share” in taxes is always for someone else.
6. You’ve really learned a lot from Greta Thunberg and AOC.
5. When you saw a migrant out yonder from your “Vineyard” mansion, you actually did clutch your pearls.
4. You lecture your immigrant cab driver on his duty to pay off your Harvard Law School student loans.
3. You hated Joe McCarthy’s goals, but love his methods.
2. From your private jet’s mobile phone, you call in to CNN about the “existential threat” from climate….
…and the NUMBER ONE TIP-OFF THAT YOU are a GENUINE PROGRESSIVE is…
1. Your big idea: transfer border patrol officers and their weapons to the IRS.
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