- Martial law imposed in Utah (just to show them who’s boss).
- In perpetuity, nuclear codes can only be activated by guys named Josh or Jeh.
- US Supreme Court justices who oppose Obama edicts must wear plaid robes in session.
- Real-time eavesdropping on NATO allies available as live streaming on “E” Network.
- Mount Rushmore to be relocated by Dept. of the Interior to Obama Presidential Center near Jackson Park in Chicago.
- Hillary Clinton, John Niskanen, Eric Holder, and Lois Lerner offered choice of amnesty, pardon or Nationals season tickets.
- Staten Island and Nantucket will trade names and elected officials.
- New improved First Amendment: “Congress shall make no snide comments besmirching the reputation of Presidents born in Hawaii.”
- Those powers not delegated to the United States Government by the Constitution now reserved for the United Nations Climate Change Committee.
…and the NUMBER ONE EXECUTIVE ORDER PRESIDENT OBAMA IS CONSIDERING BEFORE LEAVING OFFICE is:
- Voting no longer officially restricted to the living.
